In an effort to spread beauty, positivity, and joy, I’m going to start highlighting some of the beautiful books I read, or what I like to “Rose-Tinted Reads”. These might be books that tell beautiful stories, share diverse perspectives, are funny as hell, or contain gorgeous word choice or prose. Find Rose-Tinted Read #1 HERE. 

Rose-Tinted Read #2 is Brené Brown’s bestselling book on vulnerability, courage, and all the discomfort that goes along with building your life on these principles: Daring Greatly, How the Courage to Be Vulnerable Transforms the Way We Live, Love, Parent, and Lead. 

Vulnerability, or wholeheartedness, as Brown is fond of calling it, has the power to change your life. At least, that is what the book espouses. Brown draws upon sixteen years of research, firsthand experiences, and work with others as she builds the case that being vulnerable, or daring greatly, is at the core of all human experiences. Vulnerability is not weakness, or the absence of power, happiness, wealth. It is everything.

I liked this book but I have to admit that I’m only partly convinced. It’s hard to do an in-depth review on a book called “Daring Greatly” when you’re still too afraid to do most things. I’m still working on taking on some of the principles that Brown explores, but I’ll summarize a few of my more-favorite takeaways here, or as I like to call them, “Rose-Tinted Rules for Living that I Have Learned from Reading and Now Want to Share” or maybe some shortened form of this…:)

Rose-Tinted Rule #1: Don’t Squander Joy.

Brown reminds us that while we can’t prepare for tragedy, loss, or other opportunities for despair, we can choose to “soften” into joy, which actually creates resilience and hope! So when people call you naive for choosing joy or viewing the world through your rose-tinted glasses, just smile at them and relax in the knowledge that you are becoming better prepared for bad things in the future. Resilience and joy will become part of who you are.

Rose-Tinted Rule #2: Perfectionism is NOT the path to your purpose, it’s a hazardous detour.

This section of the book couldn’t have come at a better time. I recently wrote about my struggles with perfectionism HERE, and it’s been on my mind pretty consistently.

I love that Brown takes the time to dispel the myths of what perfectionism is NOT. It’s NOT striving for excellence, self-improvement, the key to success, or a way to avoid shame. It IS correlated with depression, anxiety, addiction, life paralysis, and missed opportunities. Well, check, check, check, Ms. Brown.

She explains that perfectionism actually keeps us outside of healthy competition and striving. She also explains how to use self-compassion and kindness to fight your perfectionism. I highly recommend this book for just this chapter alone.

Rose-Tinted Rule #3: Bravery Isn’t Always Glamorous.

Although much of the book focuses on vulnerability and bravery, what was the most meaningful anecdote for me that dealt with these came near the end of the book. Brown is talking to her daughter, Ellen, and encouraging her to exhibit bravery in showing up for a swimming event that she knows she won’t do well in. Brown tells her just to have a goal of showing up and getting wet. She doesn’t have to finish the event, she doesn’t have to place, she just has to get wet.

Brown says, “I had spent many years never trying anything that I wasn’t already good at doing, and how those choices almost made me forget what it feels like to be brave”.  I think it’s all too easy to fall into these patterns.

It’s easy to do things we’re good at. It’s much harder to do things we struggle with. Maybe real bravery isn’t being fearless, but knowing that we aren’t good at something and making ourselves do it anyway.

I know that fans of Brown will probably chastise me for only having read this one of her books, but I will say that I’m feeling optimistic about giving her a second chance, and I can’t wait to watch her related TEDtalk on Vulnerability with my coffee one morning this week.

Is anyone else a Brené Brown fan? Do you have a favorite of her books?

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